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COMP 1850 Lesson 1

Basic Info:

Name: Cindy Turner
Student #:A00271215

Why am I here?

An existential question at the best of times!

I currently work in the survey field and a portion of what I do is design and deploy some of our low volume/pilot online surveys. The templates supplied by the vendor are very limited, so I've taken to scavanging code from the proffessional ones and I spend a lot of time on W3schools and stackoverflow trying to figure out the things that are beyond my self-taught 'HTML4 for Dummies' (circa 1998) understanding .


Not sure if this qualifies as funny, but it was my mom's favourite.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

Answer: Because it was dead.

I know, I KNOW, it's absolutely terrible. And yet, she always thought it was hilarious, and it cracked her up every. single. time. There's really no accounting for taste.


Ok, not really a poem. A filk song, actually, by Dr. Seti. This one always makes me giggle and I never miss a chance to share it with something who might appreciate it the humour... even if it is rather dated nowadays.

You Are My Router
lyrics © 2003 by Dr. H. Paul Shuch
sung to the tune of "You Are My Sunshine"

Chorus: You are my router, my packet router.
You move my data from port to port.
My only terror is checksum error.
Please don't say 'quit, retry, abort'.

The other morning, I went out surfing
Highways and byways of th' World Wide Web.
Although connected, was redirected,
So I switched to dialup instead.


I'm daisy-chaining ten hubs and straining
The whole damn network; it's way too big.
Can't make my Wi-Fi come out of standby
Without running I P CONFIG.


Ain't got no cable to keep me stable,
No fiber optics, no shielded pair.
No RG five nine, nothin' but phone line,
So I face my blue screen and stare.


And when my net lag approaches jet lag
Packet collisions make surfing hell.
When V dot nine two no longer will do,
Then I'll switch to ADSL.


Version: 3.0 G! d- s:++ a+ C++ P L E--
W++ N w+ PS PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5+ X+ R tv- b+++
DI+ G e* h- r* z?